Ellen Million (ellenmillion) wrote,
Ellen Million
ellenmillion

Fridaily - Keeping On...

This has been a really wretched week, but I am keeping on.

My ankle is definitely sprained - still swollen, still bruised - but it's a relatively minor sprain, and I can walk without limping if I take some pain-killers and wrap it. (I just have to remember not to pivot on it, because it definitely doesn't like that.)

Valerie's death has been hard. It wasn't like it was completely unexpected (she outlived her prognosis by a few years, but had been in an out of hospitals more regularly lately), but that doesn't seem to make it any easier, and I keep expecting her to pop back up with a story about stents and infections and hospital boredom. I cried like crazy most of yesterday, but seem to be more dried up today. It's... kind of hard looking at all the projects she won't be part of anymore. I was going to do a Torn World chopping block post, but I think that will have to wait a while.

I've never lost anyone I knew well, before - unless you count Josh, but he moved away when we were in sixth (fifth?) grade and died a week to the day after I broke my back. I didn't really know who he'd grown up to be. I suspect this is pretty normal grieving behavior, and I'll be better soon.

In the interests of general disclosure, I'm seeing a trauma therapist right now. Not for Val's death, but the car accident last month really rattled some unresolved issues regarding my last car accident to the surface. You know, the one that broke my back. So, I'm getting the help I need and generally making forward, positive progress. I'm not losing weight, which is an excellent sign, and I'm staying active, using light therapy and continuing to work on creative things.

In short: I keep on keeping on. These are dark times for me, but I've been in darker. I've got my bearings, and I'm headed for the light again.



The next two Sketch Fests will be January 7-8 and 28-29! The poll came out 12 to 3 in favor of those dates. I suspect most people are pretty busy the rest of December! (Also, I'm glad for this outcome - I'd forgotten I had a dinner on the December date I proposed...)

I am going to try to get the poll up for the next round of improvements today, but we'll see how the day goes.

I have one order to print and package (remember, cheap stuff, going fast!), and I'm meeting Jake at the gym today. I won't be able to use the elliptical (stupid ankle), but I can lift weights and sit in the steam room, and that sounds quite lovely. I wonder if they have a rowing machine, or something like that to provide cardio without straining an ankle.

I've also got some paid coding work to tackle, and a potentially large project coming down the pipeline. (Cross your fingers for me!)

I'm going to set a day aside next week to read my NaNo novel, and start taking the steps to revise that into an actual thing.

Now? Shower, fire, some breakfast, and down to work.
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